Learning To Love Myself

The other night I came home from my lost dodgeball game a sore loser.  I exclaimed to Kyle: "I'm just not good at anything!"  He immediately pounced (literally) and told me he wasn't going to let me up until I named 10 things I am good at.  Dramatically, I groaned and said I couldn't think of anything!  Kyle gave me a firm look so I sighed and started listing off things like: I'm good at sleeping, I'm good at eating junk food, I'm good at watching lots of TV, I'm good at being dramatic, I'm good at being negative.  My poor husband let go of me and I could tell my words hurt him a little.  He sulked back to the couch after whispering, "I just wish you'd have some self-confidence..."

Ugh.
Talk about my life struggle.  

But Kyle really got me thinking.  Sometimes I just claim that I am "realistic" and probably better for it but at the same time it is okay to give myself credit.  So, I'd like to share with you 10 things I like about myself.

**Quick disclaimer: I'm not sharing this list via social media to receive pity or attention (that's actually contrary to my purpose).  I would like to share them for purely selfish reasons; to recognize that I can be okay with myself.  I understand that this list is underdeveloped and rebuilding my self-confidence has taken some time and will continue to be a process.

10 things I like about myself:

1. I have an innate ability to recognize other's needs and then meet those needs.  This also means that I am a good friend (well I feel like a good friend).  I try to always be there for other people and help out!  I care a lot about the people I form friendships with. 
2. I have a unique relationship with my Heavenly Father.  Based on the experiences I have gone through, I feel like I rely on Him for so much.  I tell Him everything from how I don't want to go to school to my overwhelming feelings of gratitude.
3. I make a great teacher.  I love kids and I am good at connecting with them.  I am able to understand the reasons behind a student's behavior.  From there I can plan specific lessons around a student in order to help him/her succeed.  One time during practicum I played football in high heels with four little boys who kept trying to tackle me, if that's not dedication, I don't know what is.  
4. I have a strong work ethic.  My dad taught me that if I want something in life I have to work for it, so I do.  I work hard in my marriage, I work hard in school (despite contrary opinions), I work hard in my relationships, and I work hard in my personal life to keep myself happy.
5. I am naturally obedient.  Okay, well once upon a time I was made fun of [ruthlessly] for this trait; therefore, I went into a short-lived rebellion.  I think now though, I have really come to appreciate this quality because it keeps me happy.
6. I am a HUGE Broncos fan (and that's an understatement).  Okay, I know this is a little silly but what I really mean is I follow my passions.  I cheer for the Broncos when they do good and when they do bad [see previous post].  I love America even if it is not perfect.  I watch Shark Week religiously and wakeboard even with shingles.  I am committed to my hobbies.
7. I am a creative person and I do something with my creativity!  Sometimes Kyle teases me for saving everything: clothing tags, movie tickets, and magazine clippings.  But over the years I have compiled them into a notebook that describes my interests and thoughts.  I am actually really proud of my SMASH journal.
8. Connecting with others comes pretty naturally for me.  I think that I am a friendly person.  I have a variety of friends and I get along with all of them.  I love meeting new people and getting to know them.
9. I overcome my challenges.  Though all things considered I have it pretty easy, I have also had some interesting trials but I am here today because I get back up and keep going no matter what.  I try to make the best of my situation.
10. I am passionate about education.  Most people in their free time relax or see friends.  In my free time I attend bullying prevention seminars.  After deciding officially to declare Elementary Education as my major, I have fallen in love.  I truly have never been so interested in the current issues that surround the everyday classroom environment.  I love to learn about my profession so much that I am set on getting my masters degree in a few years.  I am happy that I have discovered something I am not only good at but that I love. 

There. 10 things.  As aforementioned, self-confidence is not something that comes all at once.  Thus, I know that I will continue to struggle daily to appreciate myself and this list is just one baby-step in a lifelong process of self-appreciation. 

<33 Amanda